I love Alain de Botton in general, but this did not do it for me. I think it might work as a mini-series, but as a book it kept flip flopping in a way that made it difficult to be fully invested. ( )

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Amazing to think that this book was written by a 21-year-old! A must read for anyone who has ever been in love! ( )

This book is suffocating. It sucks up all the air and leaves you shriveled up and heaving in the corner. Not because it is so emotionally disturbing but because it takes up so much mental / intellectual space, leaving little for the reader to untangle and tease out, so fully and formidably does the narrator examine the underlying thoughts and emotions of the protagonist and his lover. It is perhaps too comprehensive, too instructive; in the end, the reader leaves with an almost mathematical understanding of love.

This is a widely highlightable book. The author has a way with language that I very, very rarely encounter, as perfect as language can get, every word delivering a specific meaning, every sentence assembling itself into the exact spot in the edifice. It's a love manual that nearly acknowledges itself as such, a philosopher laying out anecdotes from his own life as evidence for his theories, and that play of memoir v. philosophy was gratifying (but also, very rarely, grating.)

Yet, while the book didn't necessarily seize me and burrow into me and shake me on a fundamental level, it's a great one. I admire the author for his thoughtfulness, for his openness, for his exquisite style. I admire him for the way he can wax so eloquently of the enchanting mundanity of a relationship, before launching into a playfulness that is a hallmark of great writers (and people):

"Then I noticed a small plate of complimentary marshmallows near Chloe’s elbow and it suddenly seemed clear that I didn’t love Chloe so much as marshmallow her. What it was about a marshmallow that should suddenly have accorded so perfectly with my feelings toward her, I will never know, but the word seemed to capture the essence of my amorous state with an accuracy that the word 'love,' weary with overuse, simply could not aspire to." ( )

TL;DR: Get this book if you've ever (over)analyzed a relationship or been in love.

Alain de Botton guides us through the mind of a young man in love, carefully dissecting those thoughts that we've all had about ourselves, a loved one, doubts, hidden messages and everything happening during a romantic relationship.

This vivisection is minute enough to help us recognize these little thoughts as observers, which in turn lead to simple descriptions of those nagging questions and their now very logical answers. We can live the hardships of love with a clear mind and come out, if not wiser, at least a lot more knowledgeable about ourselves and our loved ones.

It's exactly as a reviewer said: a return to philosophy's core, which is to help us live our lives. Full marks for this one. ( )