*Thanks to NetGalley for providing me with an advanced copy of the book. All opinions are my own.**
The Matchmaker’s List is described as a romantic comedy, but I think it is so much more than that – I’d put it firmly into women’s fiction, as this is not all light and fluffy, and nearly all of the characters are flawed. I sat down with a hot cup of coffee to read this book, and was basically glued to my comfy chair for the next 5 hours, coffee long gone cold. Even with a chunk of the book that niggled at me and made me quite uncomfortable, I still loved it.
Sonya Lalli touches on so many themes – the fear of disappointing our parents (or grandparents, in this case), and the complexities of cultural expectations. The conversations between Raina and her best friend regarding arranged marriages in particular were thought provoking.

If you’ve ever had a mother long for you to meet the right person and settle down, you will find plenty to relate to in this book. (I married at 34. I can completely related to the “when are you going to meet a nice boy and settle down” and “you’re so picky”. Bah.) If you’ve ever endured the blind date that left you wondering why your friend thought so little of you that they thought this person would be good for you, you’ll relate to Raina’s frustration.

We follow along with Raina as she swims along in a job she doesn’t love, living in an apartment that doesn’t really feel like home, longing for the guy that didn’t love her enough, while she humors her Nani by going on blind dates that are simply disastrous. Then the love of her life (the one who got away, or at least, the one she gave up on) returns to Toronto and complicates things further.

Until this point, I’m glued – and then comes the a plot device that has me torn.

When things come to a head (especially once she discovers where Nani is getting her new list of bachelors) and Raina finally shares her frustration with her grandmother, Nani reads more into her behavior and basically offers her a way out of the blind-date merry go round she’s been on. (I really don’t want to give any spoilers here.) While she never agrees with Nani’s assumption, she doesn’t deny it, either, and that lapse creates a situation that grows out of control. (“Train wreck” is an apt description.) It’s the perfect example of how one lie (or sin of omission) can grow to monstrous proportions and hurt so many people.

While I understand in the end why Raina tries to wait to set the record straight (once it’s gone too far), I’m frustrated that (a) she used this excuse at all, as it negates the struggles that others are actually going through and (b) her friends forgive her for it, because it’s so damn selfish. (Also, I’m a little frustrated that I connected with her character so much in the beginning, because now it’s very much like a car accident – you don’t want to look but you can’t not.)

Ultimately, however, it’s a plot device that reflects the discrimination in their culture and community, and how the families deal with it. Was it the best way to do it, and can I forgive her for it? (Probably not, but yes, uneasily.)

I’m not giving away the plot twist that turns into a train wreck, but I’m thinking The Matchmaker’s List will create some interesting and opinionated discussion at your next book club meeting.

Despite the twist, I really did enjoy the book and I was indeed glued until I hit the very last page. This was definitely a book that twisted me up emotionally, and I absolutely adored Nani – she was a delight, even as she too was flawed. The Matchmaker’s List gets a solid four stars from me.

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For a book that is supposed to be a romantic comedy, The Matchmaker's List was surprisingly serious and sobering at times. I found myself tearing up at times because I'm the single, unmarried, 30-something eldest daughter of a traditional Asian immigrant family. I GET IT. I empathized so hard with Raina. And yeah, much of the plot could have been resolved earlier and cleaner if she'd just been honest with her family and friends. But hey, in some cultures, you just keep your trap shut because social conventions (hi again).

[I did find myself cringing midway through when she just let her grandmother believe she was gay to stop the barrage of blind dates. But I was pleasantly surprised at how the author handled that plot point, and even used it as a vehicle for some pointed commentary about the conservatism found in these traditional Asian communities.

Overall, I enjoyed the book. It was fun at points but also had much hidden depth. I'd definitely read another by Lalli.

Review copy courtesy of the publisher via the First to Read program. ( )

This was ABYSMAL.

I found this book **incredibly** problematic in a way that I don't think is redeemable for me. For a quick spoiler-free version of these problems: if you identify as queer or have people in your life who identify as queer or even just prefer to read books that deal with queerness in a *remotely* sensitive manner, I cannot recommend highly enough that you do not read this book. I will move the spoilers down to the bottom of this review. I found this absolutely inexcusable.

But even if that somehow in itself didn't convince you not to pick up this book, let me describe my other thoughts on this book, because I didn't find it remotely enjoyable. It's been a very, very, very long time since I read a book so different from its synopsis. The synopsis makes you think that this book will be a cute story about blind dates and the Indian community. "Sounds great," thought I. But that's really not accurate at all. What actually happens is that the main character, Raina, goes on a few blind dates but really just spends half of the book pining after her truly toxic ex. (Yes, there could be a good story here [albeit not the one on the synopsis] about discovering one's self-worth and moving on from a toxic relationship. But that's not this story.) And all the while, she's an awful person. In addition to the irredeemable actions mentioned above (which I truly cannot overstate), she is childish, unthinking, and grating throughout the book. She also pushes away all of her family and friends (truly, I think she screams at almost all of the other characters at some point or other) while somehow remaining a golden child for whom everything magically works out and who never has to be held accountable for her numerous very bad decisions.

I feel a bit bad panning this book so totally, but I honestly cannot think of anything to redeem it. I appreciate the idea of exploring life as an Indian young woman in a fairly conservative community, but this book was *emphatically* not a good way to do that.
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SPOILERS:
Now, to elaborate on the inexcusably problematic parts of this book with spoilers: Our main character Raina spends half the book pining after her objectively really shitty ex but can't bring herself to tell her grandmother that she's still into him, so she *pretends to be lesbian* and lies about this to her grandmother and the broader community. She gets mad at her best friend when she doesn't support her lies. She continues her lies when a younger kid in the community, *who is actually gay*, asks her for help in coming out to his parents. For some reason the only other (actual) lesbian character in the book is totally fine with this and goes along with all of it. And somehow, at the end of the book, Raina is a paragon of virtue for helping people in her community to overcome their homophobia? ( )

bailed at 24% 2:33:09

The year Raina Anand turns twenty-nine, her Nani gets a jump on the promise Raina made to allow her grandmother to play matchmaker. Raina isn't thrilled by the guys she meets in the process and she's still not over a guy from her past, which makes the forced mating process even more painful. As Raina struggles with how to keep from disappointing Nani while also staying true to herself, she finds herself embroiled in a mess of her own making that threatens to hurt far more than just her.

I really loved this novel. Raina is flawed and makes some truly dumb choices at certain points but everything about her felt real and understandable. Her relationships with her family and close friends are complicated but wonderful to spend time with and it's a delight to see all of the characters grow over the course of the novel. While there's definitely romantic element to the plot, romance definitely isn't the focus here. Instead, we spend a year with Raina as she figures out who she is and what she wants and it's a delight to witness the process. Recommended. ( )