Dudes Rock (Derogatory). Hard DNF

*Nothing to do with the Netflix series (aside from one easter egg in the show) *

CW: Antisemitism, Islamaphobia, Sexual Assault

I made it about two hours into this, before getting some real bad vibes from what seemed to be real antisemitism and victim blaming for the suffering of the Jewish community at the hands of vampires due to refusing to wield a crucifix. That's when I went to read some reviews and get a better idea of what this book was and whether I was picking up on red flags. What I saw was that there was more antisemitism, Islamaphobia, and the lesbian anarchist feminist gets gang raped because, of course that's the kind of BS bad horror is filled with -- I'm all for pulp shlock, but this is fully the kind of 'non-political' art that very much has a bigoted Christian heteronormative viewpoint and agenda.

The fart-sniffing forward by the author should have been taken as a real warning. The weird gatekeeping around vampires and more modern, often femme and Queer created stories, is genuinely gross. Vampires come from the folklore of cultures from all over the world and have always come in different shapes and sizes. I do prefer the monstrous and smooth, calculating demons over heartthrobs, but there's more than one way to stake an undead, and getting all there's a right and wrong way to do it is, frankly, embarrassing.

The vibe I was getting was what if Salem's Lot and Dusk til Dawn were combined with the quality of one of the last dead horse sequels (No shade on Return to Salem's Lot, aside from the racism, that is gloriously awful). As you can see from many other reviews, your mileage may vary.

I generally try to be positive and I am more likely to critique something I actually enjoyed, but when you are just casually being bigoted and going out of your way to be misogynistic and queerphobic, I'm going to talk about it. ( )

'Midnight Mass' is one of those books that should come with multiple trigger warnings for torture, gang rape, sexual slavery, the murder of children, desecration, executed bodies hung from telegraph poles, and cannibalism.

I read to the end of the book because the plot had its hooks in me and I wanted to see how things would work out. With the benefit of hindsight, the knowledge wasn't worth the trauma - which means my experience pretty much mirrors that of the 'good guys' in the story.

In his 'Author's Note' at the beginning of the book, F. Paul Wilson explains that 'Midnight Mass' was

'born out of my dissatisfaction with the tortured romantic aesthetes who have been passing lately for vampires. I wanted to get back to roots and write about the soulless, merciless, parasitic creatures we all knew and loved,’

He certainly succeeded in that. There is nothing to like about these vampires and a great deal to fear. They are some of the nastiest vampires I've read about: physically repulsive, merciless, predatory, aggressive, fundamentally selfish but organised, adept at psychological warfare and bent on world domination. Perhaps the scariest thing about these vampires is that they think the same way that the guys behind Bannon do. They set out to destroy hope and trust by weaponising the most violent and selfish elements of humanity and then use fear to keep control.

F. Paul Wilson doesn't stop at one set of monsters. He also gives us the Cowboys / Vichy / Serfs. These are the dregs of humanity - biker gangs, drug dealers, violent criminals, city traders - who keep the vampires safe by day and wrangle the human cattle in exchange for being turned into vampires after ten years of service.

So who does Wilson set against this growing empire of evil? Sadly the 'good guys' read like the start of a joke and they end up being cliché heavy. The 'good guys' are:

A Rabbi who is prepared to wear a crucifix if it keeps vampires away. He was the only good guy I believed in.

A nun turned vigilante assassin who uses her chemistry teacher background to make bombs, napalm and suicide vests.

A Catholic priest with a drink problem, exiled from his parish after being accused of molesting a child.

The priest’s niece a vegan, atheist, lesbian and nunchuck wielding martial arts expert.

F Paul Wilson really puts these good guys through hell and he gives no guarantees that they'll survive the experience.

Wilson describes himself as someone who was raised as a Catholic but is in remission. I was surprised at his very naive portrayal of the two nuns in the book. I've never met nuns quite so unworldly as these two.

The best thing about 'Midnight Mass', the thing that kept me reading to the end, was the cleverness of the plot. The vampire strategy for taking over America was well thought-through, the vampire world-building was effective without getting mired in detail and I was constantly kept guessing about what the good guys would do to oppose the vampires and whether or not they would succeed.

The bad thing about 'Midnight Mass', the thing that almost made me set it aside a couple of times was that the violence was graphic cruel, degrading, frequent and utterly casual. I thought that this was made worse by the unconvincing reactions of the good guys to what was going on. They bounced back too easily. They felt guilty about all the wrong things. They weren't angry enough. All of which tended to normalise what the vampire and the cowboys were doing.


'Midnight Mass' was made into a movie directed by Tony Mandile, who also wrote the screenplay together with F. Paul Wilson. In the movie the good guy characters get compressed from four to two. The rabbi and the nun disappear. The reviews I've read are all of the 'Don't bother with this' kind or worse.

The book is better but it's certainly not for everybody.

( )

A rabbi, a priest, a nun and a lesbian... no, they don't walk into a bar; they are fighting vampires. Seriously. And it's not actually as much fun as it sounds.

Ok, in fairness it's not a TERRIBLE book. It does move along and has some entertainment value. I dislike it for two reasons. First, because I love Wilson's Repairman Jack series and think that an author of this caliber should know better. Second, because quite frankly it's offensive on several levels and I don't feel I need to put up with it. Yes, it offends Jews and Catholics just about equally (although unlike some other reviewers I believe his view of Judaism and portrayal of Jewish characters is based on ignorance rather than bias), but that's not exactly a selling point to me.

As an aside, in the Author's Note, Wilson complains about the "modern" take on the vampire genre. Fair enough, but then he goes and does something that has been one of the biggest complaints of vamp genre purists. If that kind of thing appeals to you, the Twilight series has done a marvelous job of it (I say this without irony because that particular theme is the reason I like Twilight in spite of the cheese). If it doesn't, this book will tick you off as false advertising.

All of that having been said, I hope most readers will discover the Repairman Jack series first and will not write off this clearly talented author because of this one dud. Everyone's entitled to have one. We just don't have to read it. ( )

Midnight Mass is a vampire novel. WAIT, Don't stop reading! They aren't sparkly or charming, they don't solve mysteries, and they don't participate in bestiality-on-necrophilia 'romance' porn with werewolves, I swear! These are more traditional vampires. Scary ones. They are blood-thirsty 'monsters' who stalk the night and eat babies!

Naturally there has to be a twist of some kind, because that Stoker guy already wrote a scary vampire novel. So Wilson's vampires are rapidly taking control over the entire world. Having wiped out most of the human population from Europe to Asia, they are now conquering America through the east coast. This gives the novel an apocalyptic feel, as the few remaining survivors struggle to survive in a world where the night is unsafe.

And who better to save the world than a cross-wielding Jew, a priest accused of raping his altar boys, and a schizophrenic nun! Yeah really. It's not as absurd as it seems typing it now, although some of the later happenings are a bit strange. The end of the book feels rushed, it could really have used another 50 or so pages to flesh out the story a bit more. That's one of my few complaints, really. That and the book's use of some silly 80's-ish stereotypes, but I can forgive those too, I suppose.

I always find it hard to complain when I wish books were longer, I generally consider that a good sign. It's not perfect, but I enjoyed reading it. I'd call it a solid, readable, not-so-bad 3-star book. ( )

I had high expectations for F. Paul Wilson's Midnight Mass. The premise is just so promising. Vampires have streamed out of Eastern Europe and conquered most of the world. They are just now encroaching on the U.S. and have taken Manhattan and most of the East Coast. These are old school, hissing at the cross, burning in the sun vamps. No tear in the eye watching a rose wilt for these guys.

I liked Midnight Mass, but to me F. Paul Wilson's vision just wasn't grand enough. His idea was epic in scope, but the way it played out felt too small.

For example, through the whole book I was wondering why the 'cowboys' (humans the vampires employ to defend them when the sun is up) didn't raid a police station or one of the many military installations dotted all up and down the East Coast and secure some heavy armament. Vampires control the Eastern Seaboard and their stormtroopers are just a loose-knit group of slobs armed with pistols?

It was like Wilson just didn't think of that. There were quite a few sections where I was thinking 'Why didn't they...?' and always I got the feeling it was because the author just didn't think of that.

The premise sounded like a vampire epic in the making, but the execution was just too pedestrian. I liked the book well enough as a forgettable page turner, but it could have easily been so much more memorable. ( )