Clean : a proven plan for men committed to sexual integrity
Weiss, Douglas
Nashville : Thomas Nelson, c2013.
1/16/16

I called Jim Berg last October...

*1 Sexual revolution of '60's combined with explosion of internet has devastated morality 208-11
*19-20 Land is clean or unclean based on morality of its people
27 Porn is so accessible
*30-31 Do not tolerate wrongdoing
41 Issue is about ruling with Christ
47 Weapons are fear of Lord, wisdom, Word of God, accountability, honesty, porn blockers, and accountability software
49 Don't objectify women(—see them as hologram) 94, 140
*52 Consider consequences 97, 180, *191
53-54 Beware at initial danger
*56-57 Beware secrecy *179-180
56 Lot
58 Make public commitment
*60 Block internet, Facebook-"little time"
*61 Accountability *93
66 Sex within marriage is beautiful
*65 U + P = D
68 Every man should and can have a clean life!
73 A wife preoccupied with food is an evidence of her husband preoccupied with uncleanness
*81 U + C = L , you plus clean equals life (or life-giving)
**84-92 Bonding chemically
*85 Wiring-imprinting
*87 Landmines
*94 Braindar--a man knows when an immodest woman is nearby without looking, and he needs to train himself not to look, "This braindar can sense a trigger, image, shape, or color of hair before you make full visual contact with this person or image."
98 Protect women 186
*102 Emotions allow us to interact relationally
105 The body is holy and therefore interesting?
*111 Holiness needs covered 112, 116
**113 What we do with nakedness affects our children
*123 Tithing
*126 Report to pastor
*130 Permission not forgiveness--rebellion "Forgiveness not permission is the motto of those in rebellion against authority."
*132 Authority
*138 Ownership versus occupation
140 Relationships-put every woman in your life into an appropriate relationship context (sister, mom)
*145-6 Don't think problem doesn't exist
146 Ask other brothers
153 God wants the best for us 182
155 Sinning/repentance cycle
**157ff Principle of confessing to another man Jms. 5:16 158
*165-6 Why no confession-list: pride, don't want to change, love this sin
*176-188 Principles to keep out of trouble--10
179 Don't believe in secrets 180
*182 See every woman not your wife as having an exit sign on her
*188 Hero only to one
190ff Addiction signs
*195 Recovery regimen--5 steps
199 Intimacy anorexia
*208 Porn/immorality destroys cultures
*209-219 Staying on offense--lead others to Christ, talk to sons, question brothers, discuss consequences, bring in speaker, have "ask and tell" policy
**213 Have dating policy for singles--not just for Academy
213 Covenant Eyes 215-icon pops up
214 Structured reading for engaged couples
219 Include in sermons

E 50-m, 210

X? 105-Skin is holy? 185 Obedience discounted? 124/189 Ecumenical flavor

Can we develop a theology of male-femaleness?!

Sex-difference between male and female, at core of being, essence of all relationships
C. S. Lewis Space Trilogy
Clean allows us a format to gracefully address an issue which is pervasive in reality.

Scriptures I Thes 4:1-12; Gen 1:26-27—Rev 22:17; Gen 2:24-25; Potiphar's wife; David and Bathsheba; Solomon’s many strange wives; Proverbs 5:15-23; 7:1-27; 9:17; SS-preached clandestinely; Mt 5:28-whoso looks on; 12:39/16:4-wicked and adulterous; Rom 1: 16-32; I Cor 7:1-4ff; Gal 1:4-present evil world; 5:19-21; Phil 4:8; II Tim 2:2

I read Clean A proven plan for men committed to sexual integrity, in exchange for honest review by Douglas Weiss. The book was published by Thomas Nelson. I chose this book because, even though I am not a man, I can still find some insight to apply to my celibacy.When I noticed the book on Booksneeze, I had to have it.

Some of the highlights from the book:
Many church leaders fall to temptation themselves, and the ones who do stay pure are often at a loss as to how to help those struggling (p. xvi). (note: I wish my church offered something on purity and celibacy to adults, instead of just to kids. I have asked, but no program exists yet. I am not even sure who to ask to get an accountability partner, without revealing too much of my past).
Internal transformation requires work (p. xvi).
Pages 6 to 9 discusses the prevalence of pornography using statistics. That section was mind-blowing. Porn is a billion dollar industry. Some internet porn is worth millions and billions. America is the top producer of DVD porn.
Both men and women watch porn. Children, who watch porn, face detrimental effects, which include emotional trauma; reduced marriages; exposure to incorrect information about human sexuality, and increased risk of sexual compulsions.
There is a direct connection between your sexual behavior and your destiny in Christ (p. 21). Our level of sexual purity will determine how useful and effective we are.

Getting one taste of something can lead to wanting more (p. 32). If you think you can control lust, then you are deceived (p. 33).
When God has to discipline someone because of a hardened heart, things can go wrong for them (p. 35). The book gave the story of Terry, who printed off internet porn at work. The printer stopped working temporarily. Once it started printing, IT was called. They traced the problem to Terry. Terry got fired and his wife later divorced him. (p. 36). Paul was making a phone call to set up some sex, but did not realize his wife was on the other line. Stan was blackmailed by his mistress, while Marc was sued for sexual harassment.
God provides you weapons to deal with the enemy (p. 47). Some weapons include the fear of God, wisdom, and the word of God. The limitation of the weapons is that they can only go in one direction at a time (either facing the enemy or facing those you love. )
Lust is wrong. Lust can produce fruit and it can lead to death. The first stage of sin is lust. (p. 49). Sin is the evidence the seed has grown (p. 49). Sin also can be fertilized with repeat behavior (p. 50).
You have to be willing to become clean. You need the right protection, armor, and a plan to become clean (p. 58 to 59). You also need to be honest and accountable (p. 61). You also need a consequence set-up, if you do fall prey to sexual sin (p. 62).

Sexual immorality does not just affect you, but everyone else around you. Job, family, kids, social life, etc. I did not realize this until years and years later. If I stayed out late, someone would have to wake up to let me in (since I never had my own place). I had to work hard to hide toys and my porn addiction. Hiding the laptop under covers and plugging the ear phones in, for example. I sought out pleasure before relationships. Pleasure also caused me to think lust was love. I been addicted a few times. I wanted to date some of these men, not for their brains and long-term potential, but for their body parts (and what the body parts could do). Sexual immorality definitely distorted relationships. I heard rumors of people not liking me because I was too sexual, but at the same time, the person, who told me about the rumor, wanted to have sex with me. Sex defined how I treated people of the opposite sex. If you wanted to date me, then I would not have sex with you. If you wanted sex, then it was mostly a one-night stand. Had no interest in repeat sex partners, unless they met a few standards.

I loved this book and definitely recommend it to men and women.