Andrew Solomon

Why are so many books about depression written by people like this? They always seem to have someone to help them, someone to put an arm around them and comfort them, someone to talk to about what’s happening to them, someone to listen—and wouldn’t last five minutes living the sort of life most of its sufferers are forced to. “My father”, “my family”, “my circle of friends”; “my literary agent”, “my publisher”, “a journalist / director / professor I know”; “my analyst”, “my therapist”, “my psychopharmacologist”… Most depressed people have none of these, and none of the money this author clearly has either (“my psychopharmacologist”???).
    True, The Noonday Demon is comprehensive, thoughtful, some of the writing wonderful—and there were one or two memorable details: depression among the Inuit inhabitants of Greenland for instance (where an incredible 80% of the adult population suffers from it). The chapter about the history of the condition was interesting too: the ancient Greeks had a surprisingly modern and sympathetic view of depression (particularly their doctors, most notably Hippocrates) and it was the Christian worldview—converting an illness into a sin—which saddled it with the stigma it’s been stuck with ever since.
    Overall, though, I learned precious little in return for slogging my way through 512 pages. Above all, it just made me bloody angry. During one of the author’s own depressive episodes for example: “Some dear friends, recently married, moved into my house and stayed with me for two months, getting me through the difficult parts of the days, talking through my anxieties and fears, telling me stories, seeing to it that I was eating, mitigating the loneliness…my brother flew in from California…my father snapped to attention…” This guy is living on another planet.… (lisätietoja)

Solomon looks in incredible detail at what he terms "horizontal identities". Vertical identities are identities that parents share with their children i.e. race would be a vertical identity. Horizontal identities are ones where the characteristics are not necessarily shared with the parents i.e. transgender or autism or sometimes deafness. Solomon writes extensively on each of these various differences.

He writes with incredible empathy, but really tries to show all sides of every issue. There are sides? Yes, there really are. If you are deaf, should you or should you not get a cochlear implant and at what age? What types of interventions are best for a child with autism? Forced medications or not for someone with Schizophrenia? There are actually an amazing number of issues and disagreements with how to proceed when a child manifests any of these issues. Limb lengthening for dwarfs? Parents disagree on all of these issues and more, but throughout Solomon shows respect for all the viewpoints while providing medical arguments and whatever evidence is available for the reader. And he also shows how parents often love these children as they are and don't wish them to necessarily be different. Just a very, very compelling read. I think they should excerpt some of this for use in schools to foster better understanding of differences.

The amount of research this guy did was incredible. It is a lot of anecdote, but that is what truly brings the book to life. It was a sociological study, a psychological study, and yet also a true testament to the power of parental love.

One thing I especially enjoyed is that the author didn't totally squelch his own opinions and insight out of the book. If he had some philosophical thoughts or perspective, he wasn't afraid to share those. I think that brought a humanity to the book that you wouldn't usually see in a non-fiction treatise that also has a bit of an academic bent to it.

At any rate, I would highly recommend this book as it fosters humility, empathy, and understanding as well as a deep appreciation for one's children. And gratitude on my part for having such an easy life by comparison. And admiration for those who carry big burdens, often with such love and grace.… (lisätietoja)

An exploration of families in which children have "horizontal" identities that distance them from their parents - Deaf, dwarfism, autism, prodigies, Down syndrome, mental illness, conceived in rape, criminal behavior, and more. The author is a gay Jewish man whose parents weren't really comfortable being Jewish and not happy about his gayness. He's trying to cover a lot of ground here - it's a huge book - and not all of it works, but it's thought provoking. For me, who never wanted children, both interesting and off-putting, yet fascinating to see the different choices and outcomes. I think the section on prodigies was the most eye opening for me.
There's a bit too much "I wouldn’t trade my experience because it’s brought me so much joy” because to be honest, some of the stories sound really awful and these declarations rarely feel believable to me. Disability porn. Who’s brave enough to say “This isn’t what I hoped for and I can’t take it much longer.”?… (lisätietoja)