In the follow-up to Bloodsucking Fiends, You Suck follows our fledgling vampires as they figure out their world as the newly dead. I love Moore's casual wit and humor, and it was fun to see characters from his other works make appearances throughout the story. Again, a cute, quick read. I personally loved how this story ended and I'm excited to see that he will be continuing Tommy and Jody's story in his new book Bite Me. ( )

Brilliantly funny sequel to Blood Sucking Fiends ( )

I have such a mixed relationship with Christopher Moore's books. This one may have been better if I had read _Bloodsucking Fiends_ before it. All the same, I found this plot and characters hard to engage with and then end just seemed a little too tidy.

All in all, Moore just seems to be hit or miss to me. ( )

I thought it would be funnier ( )

'You Suck' is the sequel to 'Bloodsucking Fiends' and follows similar territory to the first, with two fresh vampires discovering that it's not easy being nocturnal killers. The night-crew from the first book are back too, as are the requisite detectives, although it's no simple rehash. This time a couple of new characters appears, one utilising her emo-goth diary as a form of narrative, which is frequently witty and satirical. The other is a blue hooker! The injection of the new characters mix up what could have been an unnecessary second novel. The humour is less laugh-out-loud than previous books, however it still brims with clever humour. The finale is a bit of a cop-out, although doesn't detract from the overall feel. Overall, 'You Suck' is page-turner and is a fun sequel. ( )

Christopher Moore is a comedic genius! You suck is the story of new vampires and their trials and tribulations learning the ropes...from finding a minion to dealing with a blue hooker. ( )

Christopher Moore is unrestrained and absurd as usual, however he seemed to lack his usual humor. In both Lamb and A Dirty Job I started laughing in the first paragraph and chuckled the whole way through. You Suck failed to make me laugh out loud a single time- which felt very wrong for a Moore book.

The story is interesting and is smattered with Moore’s usual cast of entertaining characters. I loved the chapters written in “Abby’s diary” and I was pleased to see how it tied in with A Dirty Job.

The ending seemed a bit strange to me and I’m not sure I like what happened to Tommy and Jody.However, I did read it in under a day so I suppose that says something.. All in all, this was a good book, but I just didn’t think it was up to par with the other Moore books I’ve read. It just wasn’t as funny as I’ve come to expect from him. ( )

Story Overview

"You bitch, you killed me. You suck!"

So begins the witty, sarcastic, bawdy romp that is You Suck -- a vampire book that makes other vampire books look positively Puritanical by comparison.

Tommy Flood awakens to find that his vampire girlfriend Jody has changed him into a vampire so she has company for the rest of time. Although at first he is a bit peeved, Tommy quickly finds that being a vampire isn't so bad -- the heightened senses make their sex even more exciting. However, the problem of food quickly arises. Jody used to feed on Tommy to keep herself alive -- but now her food source is gone and there are two hungry mouths to feed. They solve this problem creatively -- borrowing a homeless man's extremely large cat. In exchange for some booze, the cat is available for their nightly feasting.

Still, a vampire needs minions, which leads to the acquisition of Abby Normal -- teenage Goth and vampire wannabe -- whose diary entries are interspersed throughout the book and chronicle the travails of serving the Vampyre Flood and the Countess.

But even with a minion, Jody and Tommy's problems aren't quite solved. There is the little problem of the ancient vampire who created Jody and is currently trapped in bronze -- where Tommy and his band of vampire-fighting Safeway stock boys (the Animals) put him after robbing him of all his money and blowing up his yacht. And when Tommy's plan to dump the bronze statue containing the ancient vampire in the San Francisco Bay doesn't quite go as planned and the old vampire escapes -- well, trouble is afoot.

But wait...that's not all. The Animals are back from Vegas and have blown almost all the stolen money. But they are not alone. They are accompanied by Blue -- a Vegas hooker whose shtick is that her entire body is dyed blue (you know, like the Blue Man Group). She seems to have a supernatural hold on the Animals (or maybe it is the drugs), but she is slowly but surely getting all of their stolen money. Seeking help from their leader Tommy, the Animals are stunned to find that Tommy is not quite himself anymore. But Blue sees an opportunity.

And did I mention the murder investigation into the mysterious serial killer whose been terrorizing San Francisco and leaving the victims drained of blood?

My Thoughts

This book is not for everybody. I'm just going to go ahead and say that up-front. There is graphic language, drug use, sex scenes, violence, corruption of minors, drunkeness -- well, there is a little bit of everything. If material of this nature offends you, this book is not for you. However, if this stuff doesn't bother you and you have a dark sense of humor, this book is a must read! I just loved it. Let me put it this way, if you like movies like Pulp Fiction and find them funny, then you'll love this book. It has the same dark, twisted sense of humor.

After reading the Twilight books (which take vampires very very seriously), it was fun to see an author have a bit of fun with the concept of vampires. From making fun of Goth kids (who "outvampire" Tommy when he goes to a club looking for Abby) to Abby's reverential treatment of "the Vampyre Flood" (at least until she finds out he's only been a vampire for a week or so -- not centuries), Moore has a lot of fun with the vampire myths. One chapter, simply called "The Last Poop," reads in its entirety:

"So that was it?"
"Yep."
"Never again?"
"Nope."
"Not ever?"
"Nope."
"I feel like I should save them or something."
"Would you just flush and come out of there."

From worrying about Christmas gifts for their families to missing coffee to figuring out how to feed without murdering the innocent (they target those who are terminally ill and offer them mercy killing), Tommy and Jody retain much of their human qualities and compassion. And when Jody talks about how she never really felt safe until she became a vampire, I nodded my head in recognition. (What woman doesn't feel vulnerable when walking alone in a city? Wouldn't superhuman powers, strength and speed make you feel invincible too?)

Moore has a wonderfully sick sense of humor and isn't afraid to to use it. I thought the book was a lot of fun. I'll definitely be seeking out more books by this author -- which include titles such as Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal, The Stupidest Angel, Practical Demonkeeping, and Island of the Sequined Love Nun. I suspect I'm in for quite a wild ride.

A Side Note: Don't underestimate the fun of reading a book entitled You Suck. I was reading this during my son's karate lesson and saw quite a few people eyeing up the cover and furrowing their eyebrows and seeming to think: "Is she trying to tell us something?" It was kind of a cheap thrill.

My Final Recommendation

If you have a dark sense of humor and don't mind graphic language and material, this book might be right up your alley -- especially if the idea of a bawdy, witty romp that has fun with vampirism appeals to you. However, if this type of material isn't your cup of tea, I'd skip this book and look for something a little tamer. Although I found the book very amusing and fun, it isn't for everyone. ( )

I absolutely loved this book. It was just my kind of humor. Every diary entry from Abby Normal was hysterical. ( )

Title: You Suck: A Love Story

Author: Christopher Moore

Hardback: 328 pages

Date Published: 2007

Publisher: HarperCollins

ISBN: 9780060590291

Miscellaneous: You Suck is a sequel to Moore’s book Bloodsucking Fiends.

It turned out that superhuman vampire strength came in handy when shaving a thirty-five-pound cat. After a couple of false starts, which had them chasing Chet the huge shaving-cream-covered cat around the loft, they discovered the value of duct tape as a grooming tool. Because of the tape, they weren’t able to shave his feet. When they were finished, Chet looked like a big-eyed, potbellied, protohuman in fur-lined, duct-tape space boots — the feline love child of Gollum and Dobby the house-elf.

I’m not sure we needed to shave all of him,” Tommy said, sitting on the bed next to Jody as they considered the bound and shaven Chet on the floor before them. “He looks creepy.”

“Pretty creepy,” Jody said. “You’d better drink. Your wounds aren’t healing.” All her scratches, bruises, and love bites were completely healed, and except for a fleck of shaving cream here and there in her hair, she was as good as new.

“How?” Tommy asked. “How do I know where to bite him?”

“Try the neck,” Jody said.

-You Suck: A Love Story by Christopher Moore, pages 29-30

You Suck by Christopher Moore is a fun, light read about two young vampires in love who must face the difficult tasks of being UNDEAD in a day-slave world. They face the HUNGER and must feed, they must deal with vampire killers, they have to find an apartment, and… for the LOVE of ALL things UNholy! They have GOT to figure out a way to drink a cup of joe without the coffee making a forceful return trip to spooge on their shoes!

While, technically, this book is a sequel to Moore’s Bloodsucking Fiends, it is more than capable of standing alone. The past events are mentioned in a very natural way, so that you don’t have that sense of being late to the party.

Some of the best qualities of You Suck is the unusual characters and the way they all mix together. Take Blue for instance: An aging Vegas hooker whose career-prolonging gimmick is that she’s painted blue from head to toe, inspiring the reoccurring line, “Didn’t you want to bone a smurf when you were a kid?” And then there’s Abby Normal (day slave name, Allison Green) who is the emo/goth/vamp-wannabe minion of Jody and Tommy, our romantic heroes. And one of my favorite characters of the book is William, the dirty, fat, drinking/stinking bum with the 35-pound cat. William makes his money sitting in high-pedestrian areas, holding a sign that says “I’m poor and I have a huge cat” and charging passersby to touch his huge cat.

Another quality of You Suck that I enjoyed is Moore’s sense of humor, his sarcasm and his ease-of-reading writing style. He doesn’t take himself too serious as a writer, and mixes up the story telling from omniscient 3rd person and “Diary of a Put Upon Goth (closet perkie) Girl,” the subjective point-of-view of Abby Normal, which provides the outsider-wanting-in view. And Abby’s journal entries are so funny, complete with self-abasement and bunny-trails and updates on her sister’s head lice problem.

You Suck: A Love Story by Christopher Moore was my first experience with the author, but it won’t be my last In some ways, he reminds me of Janet Evanovich, who is one of my favorite “fun authors.” I give You Suck 4 out of 5 stars It’s a fun book you can sink your teeth into ^,…,^

click for the full review: http://thekoolaidmom.wordpress.com/20... ( )

I must admit that I did buy this book for its cover. I also must admit that I was disappointed. I suppose I was expecting it to be less kitschy than it was. I found myself doing mental eye rolls all throughout the novel.

The plot for me fell apart in a lot of places. I was surprised because I have heard such good things about Christopher Moore. The characters seemed to bumble about without much direction. I understand that he probably wanted to surprise the reader a bit in the ending, but he sacrificed the story quite a bit in that respect.

Jody, a sultry redheaded bloodsucker decides to turn her boyfriend Tommy into a bloodsucker so they can be together forever. She didn't however ask him first and he is none too thrilled to be thrown into this position.

Trouble is near as Jodi is being hunted by Elijah, an ancient Vampire that is pissed off because she broke the rules and turned Tommy. Tommy's crones from his warehouse job suspect Tommy of being a Vampire now and are trying to hunt him down.

Jodi and Tommy have to find a lamb to be a personal assistant for them and find them new housing, also occasionally providing them with blood. They find a little goth girl Abby Normal. She is about the funniest character in the book. Without her added to the mix I might have quit halfway through.

If anyone knows of any Christopher Moore books that are actually good, I might give him another chance. Overall I would say pass on this book. ( )

This was a sweet little young love story...with a bite! (Sorry, I couldn't resist.) The characters aren't very developed, the plot twists are reaching, and the dialogue is absurd, but all these elements are necessary in making a just plain fun campy vampire story. It doesn't take itself seriously, which is very nice to see upon exiting the recent Twilight haze. This is a sequel of a book which I have not yet read--though I know almost everything that happened in the first thanks to the second, I'll still be going back to see what I can laugh at. ( )

So much funnier than I imagined it would be. As funny as Apathy! I did not realize this was a sequel; I have to figure out what the first book was and read it, too! ( )

This is my first dalliance with the writings of Mr. Moore, and I must admit, I am thoroughly charmed.

"You bitch, you killed me! You suck!" it opens, and proceeds to get deliciously sillier from that point on. The tale of a newly-crossed-over teenage vampire and his girlfriend as they attempt to adjust to the undead lifestyle and avoid getting killed by an older vampire. The book delights in poking fun at vampire lore as well as skewering slacker, urban and goth culture. Passages of the book written in the voice of the vampires mortal minion, Abby Normal, hover on the edge between hilarious and irritating as she drifts between the personas of bubbleheaded teenage girl and stereotypical melodramatic goth. An effective technique, but perhaps not to everyone's tastes.

The book is further enlived with a cast of peculiar, random, amusing characters such as Huge Cat Guy and his pet Chet, whom, as one might guess, is a huge cat. Then there's the seemingly homeless Emporer of San Francisco and a completely blue prostitute. A "colorful" cast for sure.

Some of his smaller touches are quite amusing as well, particularly the chapter titles. One particularly brief chapter is called, quite succinctly, "The Last Poop." Indeed.

This book held many laugh-out-loud moments for me, just a fun, highly entertaining read. I docked it a half-point for a conclusion that seemed a bit flat, but otherwise, this book was just great. ( )

For better or for worse, Tommy has joined the ranks of the undead with his girlfriend. Now he has to figure out how to be a vampire, avoid the detectives who are looking them, get a minion to help them during the day, and keep his girlfriend from killing anyone. Not to mention, his old friends from the night crew at the Safeway, the Animals, have returned from Las Vegas, broke and blitzed out of their minds and they just might try to slay him... The hilarious sequel to Bloodsucking Fiends. [close] ( )

Very funny. Abby Normal is one of the best characters, and I really enjoyed getting her perspective. Hopefully we will see more of her in the future. I'm also in awe of Christopher Moore's ability to intertwine the plots of his novels. Fans will be tickled to see characters that they have grown to love, and to pick out tidbits from other stories. New comers will enjoy the easy prose, and hilarious dialogue. This book is a win/win for everyone. ( )

I liked this one more than the first, though not enough for another whole star, maybe 4.5. The animals still annoy me and I hated their whole storyline with Blue. I loved Abby, her journal entries were some of the funniest parts of the book for me. Another fun read with a funny yet bittersweet ending. ( )

For my complete review please view my blog but be warned the entry for this book is slightly spoilerish, a word I have seemingly just made up. I advise that entry not be read by those who have not first read Bloodsucking Fiends, the book for which this one is a companion to. Below are bits and pieces of the review I posted there after removing the major content that spoils.

It took longer to read You Suck than I thought it would but not for a lack of interest in reading it. I set it down with regret each time I had to lie the book aside. In some ways this story was different because a new point of view was introduced but it never failed to make me laugh. I think I can say the story only got better.

This book takes place immediately following where its companion novel, Bloodsucking Fiends, leaves off. Jody and Tommy are still in San Francisco and with a few problems:

They need to find food.
They need a new minion, or onion, if you ask Jody.
They need to find a new apartment.
They need to go Christmas shopping for their parents because in all that had been going on, they've forgotten it's only about two days away.

Through their adventures they find the strangest ways of acquiring food, searching for a way that their bodies can accept the coffee that satisfied them as humans. That comes in handy later on but I won't reveal why. Jody and Tommy get a regular blood donor with little cost to them.

Tommy's love for literature plays a role in checking 'minion' off their to-do list. Strange, amusing, Gothic, street-smart, and very much a teenager are some of best words of choice in describing Abby Normal who prefers to not use her day slave name. Abby more than happily becomes their loyal servant. Her only hope is to become one of them.

A woman named Blue comes into the story while spending time with the Animals, a nickname given to those who work Safeway's night shift. Tommy's old friends reveal Jody's secret and from then on she has one goal: "'You want to be orange?' 'Not orange, you nitwit, a vampire!'" (Moore 162).

This book is filled with just as much humor as the last book and I enjoyed it a bit more. Moore does a brilliant job capturing the point of view of the sixteen-year-old that is Abby Normal. I don't feel he could have done any better on that. I kind of missed a few things that couldn't be in this book that had been a part of the one previous but the author more than makes up for it. Hysterical!

I've loaned both books out to someone. She is ecstatic and loving the series, the first vampire books she has ever read. I see books grab at her attention on a regular basis, but these two are not books the nonfiction reader I know her to be would ordinarily pick up. I think that says something more for these two books. She says he is one of her new favorite authors! ( )

Loved this - very funny story. Especially loved the character of Abby Normal, minion to the Nosferatu. ( )

Best quote about dead hookers ever. ( )

great book very funny ( )

*sigh* See now, the thing is, I love Christopher Moore. He's what I read when I feel like reading something mindless, easy, and hilarious. His stories are absurdist but at the same time grossly formulaic (nerd/or stoner meets hot/and/or crazy girl, insert monster/ ancient evil/ deity/ large ridiculous animal that nerd/or stoner must defeat to save the girl but, oh snap, the girl can save herself cause she's some kind of a badass, insert really funny quips and situations that will seriously make the reader laugh out loud, maybe throw in a goth kid or two, everything goes horribly wrong, insert incredulous law enforcement, then everyone is happy with a giant happy ending when the beast is slain and the nerd/stoner gets laid, yeay! Of course all that happens in the multiple narrator/point of view style of Carl Hiaasen). I enjoy the predictability and accept it as a part of the mindlessness. These books can be read passively because you already know what's going to happen, just watch for the funny stuff. I've read all Moore's books except for one, it's all follows this basic formula with the exception of The Gospel According Biff which was really clever and intelligent. The problem for me started with Lust Lizard… was it necessary to have a sex scene involving a weed whacker, a prehistoric giant lizard, and washed up B movie queen off her meds? I can almost see some people nodding yes, but I could have gone without it. In Fluke we had a whaling ship attacked by a giant whale penis that covered everyone on board with 7 tons of whale semen, again I probably could have gone a whole life time without that one. In this book, you get a lot of that but less, um, disgusting. I've also noticed that lately, the dialogue between the characters is getting really sophomoric. They call each other "bee-yotch" and tease each other mercilessly in a playful 'tee hee' kind of way, sure I do that too in real life but reading it on paper is cheesy. Much like I have no desire to watch people flirting in a bar or elsewhere, I have that much less desire to flip through incessant flirting between characters in a book. (Let me take a minute to note that saying "bee-yotch" is never ok, under any circumstances, ever.) Because all the interaction between the two main characters was like this, I really hated all their dialogue. Additionally, since this was the sequel to Blood Sucking Fiends and that came out, oh, about a million years ago, it would have been nice for there to have been clearer references to the events of that book. All his stories, for the most part, occur in the same literary universe so some characters cameo or reappear, even this, which I usually love, is losing it's luster. Maybe, I've just read too many of his books? Although, I'm not really sure what I'm complaining about, he always makes me laugh and it's not like I'm reading these books for intellectual stimulation.

With all that said: This book was funny, really-really-really funny. People looked at me like I was crazy because I was laughing so hard reading it on the bus. My favorite was definitely Abby Normal, teenage goth girl and minion of evil, and her diary entries. He's played around with goth kids before, in that aspect the last book was a failure, but this time he nailed it. ( )

I love Christopher Moore's humor! This one was great as well, all the craziness with the characters from the previous book made it fun to read and get into. I like the new characters in this one, Abby Normal and her friend. But probably my favorite part about this is when you'd get the cross-over from A Dirty Job and it all clicks, amazing! I didn't love the ending but the rest was so good I still enjoyed it! ( )

After reading Bloodsucking Fiends, I could not wait to get my hands on this one. I just had to know what was going to happen. Hence the title of this posting, that is exactly how this book starts. Had me laughing right from the start. The story of Jody and Tommy continued, but I must admit this one was funnier. Some of the stuff that happened (remember no spoilers here) ( )

This was such a great, fun, hysterically funny book. How have I not read Christopher Moore's books before?

"Being the Chronicles of Abby Normal"- the best parts of the book. Each of these chapters had me laughing out loud. Tommy and Jody (the bloodsucking fiends in love) could not have found a better minion to do their bidding.

So, right, what the book is actually about... Tommy wakes up made a vampire by his girlfriend then the fun begins. Anything else?

I probably should have read Bloodsucking Fiends first, but I didn't feel lost at all. Stands alone perfectly fine. ( )